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Gapp

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Gapp Suno Bhai Gapp

Many people are good at telling things in a such a big way that even a fool can understand that he or she is telling lies. These talks in India are called "Gapp". An English not so equivalent word for it is 'gossip'. Although the listeners understand that it is not true, but still they listen to them, enjoy them and laugh at them. Some are of very low level and some of them are very sophisticated. Whosoever tells the "Gapp" is called "Gappee" or "Gapodiyaa". They are not jokes. So here are some "Gapp":

Gapp 1:

One day two Gappee got together to tell their Gapp.
One Gappee said, "My father had such a large barn that it could hold thousands of cattle."

The second Gappee said, "This is nothing big. My father had such a tall wooden log that whenever he wanted, he would shake the clouds with it and got rains."

The first Gappee was surprised to know that. He asked, "But where would he keep his log?"

The second Gappee replied, "In your father's barn."

Gapp 2:

There was man who was a very big Gappee. Sometimes his Gapp was so unnatural that people had to tell him that he should speak the truth, not the Gapp. He had a friend also. One day the Gappee asked his friend to help him by controlling him to tell the Gapp in limits. The friend agreed, but he asked that how could he help him. The Gappee said, "When you think that I am going out of limits, just warn me by pinching me in my thigh so that nobody can notice it, and I will understand your hint." The friend said "Good" and they both went to a group of people to talk. The group was talking on many topics. People were telling their adventurous stories.

Now this Gappee couldn't resist. He started telling his own adventure. "Once I went for hunting a lion. I sat on a platform built on the trees, and waited for the lion to appear. Lion was so much scared of me that he did not appear until midnight. When he appeared, I saw that that the lion was very big."

People knew that he was a very big Gappee, so one man asked to tease him, "How long it was?" Gappee said, "Oh! it must have been at least 50 yards long."  The man again asked, "With tail or without tail?"  This time Gappee replied, "I never measure the tail. It was 50 yards long without tail."

Now his friend thought, it was too much, and it was the time to warn him, so he secretly pinched him in his thigh. The Gappee understood the warning, so he said, "Maybe I said a bit high about it. It was 50 yards long with its tail." The friend thought this was still more than natural, so he pricked him again in his thigh.

The Gappee understood that he was still out of limits, so he said, "Maybe it was not 50 yards long, but surely it was 30 yards long." His friend got restless, and thinking that he was still out of his limits, pricked again in his thigh. The Gappee reduced the lion's length to 20 yards. Again his friend warned him because it was still too much.

This time the Gappee got irritated and said to his friend, "Look! I have reduced its length a lot, now I cannot reduce it any more. After all it is a lion, not a rat."

Gapp 3:

During an International conference, three scientists, an American, a German, and an Indian were talking and bragging about the technological advances of their respective countries as what their countries have achieved in the field of medicine.

The American said, - "In Washington, there was a baby boy born without arms so we attached artificial arms on him. And now that he's grown up and he has become a professional boxer and a gold medalist in the Olympics!"

The German replied, - "That's nothing compared to what we have achieved. Back in Berlin, there was a baby girl born without legs so we attached a pair of artificial legs on her. Now she is a three-time Olympics marathon gold medalist!"

The Indian interjected, - "Is that all you have achieved, just gold medalists? In Patna, Bihar, we had a baby boy born without a HEAD! We attached a COCONUT and called him Laaloo and now that he has grown up, he is the Chief Minister of Bihaar."

Gapp 4

Three boys were in the schoolyard bragging of how great their fathers were.
One boy said - "Well, my father runs very fast. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow and catches it."
Another boy said - "Ha, Ha, Ha. Do you think that's fast? Then you don't know my father. My father is faster than yours. He is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet."
Now the third one who was listening the stories lof his two classmates, spoke to them - "You two know nothing about
fast. My father is a civil servant. He stops working at 4:30 and he is home by 3:45. I think that is the fastest."

 

 

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Created by Sushma Gupta on May 27, 2001
Contact:  sushmajee@yahoo.com
Modified on 06/12/13